GET A GRIP, VIVY COHEN! by Sarah Kapit

Vivy Cohen is 11 years old, loves baseball and her lifelong dream is to be a pitcher in the major leagues. The only problem is she has never pitched in a real game and is not on any baseball team. She is also autistic and goes to Social Skills group every week and sees a therapist weekly. She usually eats lunch alone.

Her best friend is her older brother, Nate, who plays catcher with her in the park so she can practice her knuckleball. But Nate is dressing differently, smells differently and doesn’t have time to be her catcher. She wonders if he doesn’t like her anymore. But Nate has a secret that he is not ready to share.

Her parents are supportive, but her mother is overprotective. When she asks her parents to join a baseball team her mother is worried it may be too stressful for her. Sometimes when Vivy is frustrated or angry, she has a meltdown, a screaming or crying tantrum, she may also rock back and forth. Her mother relents and allows Vivy to join the team.

She is one of the best pitchers on the team and Alex, her catcher, becomes her best friend.

Her teacher gives the students a writing assignment. Vivy picks V. J. Capello, a famous baseball player. They establish a pen pal relationship and Vivy shares her thoughts, feelings and emotions.

Kyle, the coach’s son, bullies Vivy. She can’t tell her parents about the bullying because she is worried her parents would make her quit the team. She can’t tell the coach because who would he believe, her or his own son? With the encouragement of V. J. Capello, she figures out how to deal with the bully.

All is going well until she has a horrible accident on the field. Her injury has healed, but her mother forbids her to play baseball again. Her correspondence with V. J. Capello has soured. She doesn’t know why. She continues writing emails but deletes the drafts.

Her parents have a plan to allow Vivy to continue being a part of the team. She is on her way to realizing her dream and has made new friends, including a major league pitcher.

Themes: family, sibling relationships, bullying, friendships

Dial Books for Young Readers, MG, ©2020

Journaling to Improve Your Voice

We know, as writers, that voice is probably the most important quality of our writing. But, regrettably, it is the hardest aspect to understand, develop and explain. Some say it can't be learned, but I disagree.

Thankfully, we have tools and resources at our disposal to help us with our writing. We can correct our grammar and spelling by using Spell-checker, we can learn about point-of-view, plot, setting, tone, character development and other elements of writing by reading books and blogs on writing. Read books in and outside of your preferred genre. Read different authors. How is their voice distinct?

But, developing a unique voice requires work. Start journaling, write down your thoughts, what haunts you, what excites you, be honest in your writing, feel your feelings, read your work out loud, pay attention to dialogue, word choice and arrangement.

Closing thoughts: read more, write more.

https://scriptmag.com/features/what-it-is-writers-voice-and-why-cultivating-your-unique-voice-important

by Angela Bourassa

https://www.writersdigest.com/be-inspired/how-do-i-find-my-voice-in-writing

by Robert Lee Brewer

Should You Trust Your Narrator?

One of my favorite picture books is THE TRUE STORY OF THE 3 LITTLE PIGS! by Jon Scieszka, illustrated by Lane Smith. Besides the attitude of the wolf, the fun is knowing he’s lying, and for little kids who know the real story, they enjoy being in on the secret.

For adults, when they discover the author is using an unreliable narrator, they must question everything they thought they knew about the characters and the story. The story becomes more interesting. This literary device encourages readers to keep reading to discover what else the author is hiding and why.

THE GIRL ON THE TRAIN by Paula Hawkins uses an unreliable narrator. Rachel, the main character, also a drunk, thinks she witnessed a murder. As she investigates, she becomes personally involved with the case and entangled in the lives of the other characters. Can the reader believe a black-out drunk?

There are three types of unreliable narrators:

1. Deliberately unreliable: Narrators who know they are lying. They lie because the point of view is theirs and they can tell the story whichever way they want.

2. Evasively unreliable:  Narrators who aren’t aware they are lying. This can be the author’s way of telling a story so that it proves something or serves his purpose.

3. Naively unreliable: Narrators who tell the truth, but lack the information. For example, child narrators are truthful, but don’t understand the way the world works or understand the consequences of what they’re seeing or hearing.

If you use an unreliable narrator, make sure your narrator has a reason for deceiving the reader. Confuse the reader just enough so the reader doubts or questions the narrator;  is the author lying, and why?

Below is my source and a link to the top ten unreliable narrators.

https://blog.reedsy.com/unreliable-narrator/

https://www.theguardian.com/books/2017/jan/04/top-10-unreliable-narrators-edgar-allan-poe-gillian-flynn

 

 

Tips for Writing in Verse

Writing is hard, no matter what age group you write for, and writing in verse is even harder.

Here’s why: the rhyme and meter has to be perfect; the story still needs a narrative arc with increasing tension, the main character needs to solve the problem and the story needs a satisfying ending; and many times, the writer focuses on the rhyme and meter that the story elements are left behind.

You may say what about books that are lists, there is no narrative arc, no main problem for the character to solve, it is simply a list. A list it is, but those books are written by award-winning authors whose books are bestsellers.

For example, Duck & Goose How Are You Feeling? by author illustrator Tad Hills, as the title suggests, several emotions are illustrated – selfish, proud, frustrated, and others. His books are sweet and charming with name and character recognition.

I read some authors that write picture books in verse, write out the story in prose first. Once they are satisfied that the story has all the story elements then they work on the rhyme and meter.

In addition to studying stories in verse, and reading books on craft, I suggest reading book reviews from reputable sources. These reviews are a teaching moment. They tell us what they liked about the story, and/or what was lacking and what was excellent. Whether you write in verse or prose, it’s all about the story.

Betsy Bird’s blog https://afuse8production.slj.com/category/reviews/

Board Books, reviews by Betsy Bird

https://afuse8production.slj.com/2022/06/21/2022-board-books-some-delights-so-far/

Breaking Down a Query Pitch

Writing a query pitch requires one to pare down their story to seven sentences or less. Whether your story is a picture book or an adult novel, writing an effective query pitch is challenging. Use the following questions to help you state the key points in your query.

Who is the main character (MC)?

What is the MC’s problem?

What is the MC’s goal?

What are the obstacles preventing the MC from obtaining their goal?

What’s at stake? Make it personal.

What happens if the goal is not reached?

For picture books, how does the MC solve the problem?

For middle grade and older, read the back jacket copy of published works. You’ll notice it doesn’t state how the character solves the problem, it is more of a tease or left unanswered.  

I sent my 4-sentence picture book query below to Jennie Dunham Literary, Inc. and she requested the manuscript.

When Charles visits his grandma in the country, he misses the excitement and noise of the big city and wants to go home. Charles tries to adapt to his new environment by making his own noise. After several attempts of making smaller noises, his imagination kicks in and soon enough the whole farm is in an uproar. Charles is enjoying his time with his grandma and can’t wait for his next visit!

Breaking it down:

When Charles (MAIN CHARACTER) visits his grandma in the country, (OBSTACLE, NATURE OF COUNTRY IS QUIET), he misses the excitement and noise of the big city (MC’S PROBLEM) and wants to go home. (WHAT’S AT STAKE, NOT VISITNG GRANDMA) Charles tries to adapt to his new environment by making his own noise. (GOAL) After several attempts of making smaller noises, his imagination kicks in and soon enough the whole farm is in an uproar. (MC SOLVES PROBLEM) Charles is enjoying his time with his grandma and can’t wait for his next visit! (IF GOAL NOT REACHED, CHARLES WILL NOT COME BACK)

Excluding how the problem is solved, my query would have looked like this:

When Charles visits his grandma in the country, he misses the excitement and noise of the big city and wants to go home. Charles tries to adapt to his new environment by making his own noise. Charles solves his problem and is enjoying his time with his grandma and can’t wait for his next visit!

Adding how the character solves the problem makes the query stronger.

If the seven sentences or less doesn’t work for you, use the number that you need to answer the above questions, but keep the pitch to two or three short paragraphs.

  

The Important First Chapter

You may hear writers groan when they have to rewrite their first chapter again and again. Sometimes, it is because the story you started writing has changed and the first chapter doesn’t lead the reader to the final chapter. Being aware of your first chapter’s tasks may shorten your revision time. Some of my examples are personal favorites or well-known titles. The goals of your first chapter are listed below:

1. Grab the editor’s, agent’s or reader’s attention by your compelling first few lines, sentences and paragraphs

In THE BOOK THIEF by MARKUS ZUSAK, his sixth line reads “You are going to die.” What? Why?! You are immediately intrigued, curious, maybe even frightened, but you keep reading.

2. Introduce the main characters

In THE GIRL ON THE TRAIN by PAULA HAWKINS, Rachel is a heavy drinker, divorced, and unhappy. She lives in Cathy’s flat, a former school friend, and frequently leaves drunken messes that Cathy cleans up. We learn about Rachel’s former life with Tom, her ex-husband, who she still loves. Rachel doesn’t respect boundaries and drunk calls and texts him which causes problems between him and his new wife, Anna. Rachel is obsessed with a couple that she watches through the train window at a signal stop. She calls them Jess and Jason and has invented a perfect, happy life for them.

3. Hints at theme

In THE GREAT GILLY HOPKINS, a Newbery Honor, by KATHERINE PATERSON, we learn in the first chapter Miss Ellis, the social worker, has placed Gilly with multiple foster families desperately trying to find a home for her. The theme is about love and belonging.

4. Sets the tone

Is your story humorous with silly plotlines line the CAPTAIN UNDERPANTS books by DAV PILKEY or is it a serious subject like gangs and police violence in THE HATE U GIVE by ANGIE THOMAS?

5. Lays down the foundation for conflicts or problems that will arise later

In THE HATE U GIVE by ANGIE THOMAS, Starr and her friend, Khalil, suspected of being a drug dealer, run out of a party after shots are fired by a gang member. They drive away, but see the flashing lights of a siren behind them. We have a shooting in a black neighborhood and a cop pulling over the main character and her friend, what could go wrong?

Once you’ve completed your novel, you may have to revise your first chapter to include or strengthen one or more of the elements listed above.

You can do it!

Visions by Cheryl Rainfield

Kate, a teenager, has debilitating asthma which threatens her life, but also makes her an observer of life. She can’t participate in sports, can’t enjoy the outside world when the pollen count is too high, but that’s not all, cigarette smoke, perfumes and different scents also trigger an asthma attack. But severe asthma attacks also elicit second sight.

She has a contentious relationship with Jenna, her older sister, who feels ignored, unloved and jealous of her mother’s chronic attention to Kate and her asthma.

Besides being chronically ill, Kate is queer and bullied at school, but she has a joyfriend, Desi. Kate experiences the thrill and excitement of her first kiss and first relationship.

Kate’s visions warn her of people in danger. She sees her sister, Jenna, being beaten to death by her husband, Mason, and Desi’s sister, Inez, considering suicide by overdose after being assaulted and shamed on social media.

But she can’t change the outcome of her visions; she tries warning people, but they don’t believe her.

Kate must find a way to control her visions without jeopardizing her life, save Jenna from her abusive husband and save Inez from herself. If that wasn’t hard enough, she has to save herself from Mason, who wants to eliminate her.

VISIONS by Cheryl Rainfield is a vivid, emotional, suspenseful story and also one of family, love, compassion and forgiveness.